桐壺147:おぼしまぎるとはなけれど、おのづから御心うつろひて、こよなうおぼし慰むやうなるも、あはれなるわざなりけり。
かくて帝は桐壺を失った悲しみをすっかり忘れるというわけでもなかったのだが、しかしいつしか気持ちに変化が生まれ、藤壺と語らっている時ばかりはこよなく御心が慰むようになっていった。これまた胸打たれる事実であった。
N君:However, from His aspect, the company with Lady Fujitsubo brought Him a small change of mind which led to a comfortable situation for Him, though He never forgot the grief of having lost Kiritsubo. At any rate, it was a touching fact that He was being revitalized.
S先生:第1文の company は同伴の意でこの抽象名詞を主語にするという構成は良いのですが、なんとなく全体的に説明表現が多くて締まりがない。もう少し引き締まった文を書くように意識してください。
Though He did not forget His deep sorrow with which He had been filled when she was gone, He came to feel comforted when He had a talk with Fujitsubo. To their relief, His feelings had been changed without their noticing it.